Starting Over

Hi everyone! I know it’s been a while since I posted, but wow – May has been a crazy busy month!

Today, I’m going to tell you all something about me that you probably don’t know…

I have anger problems. Really bad. Sometimes I get so mad at things – things that aren’t even worth being so upset over. And I hold onto my anger until it just sort of fades away.

I got really mad today. Ridiculously mad. I wanted to scream and I even slammed my fist on my computer desk because I was so frustrated.

How I’ll react when I’m mad:

1. I’ll start yelling.
2. My eyes will get really wide.
3. I’ll start crying.
4. You might find me hit a pillow or my computer desk or something.
5. I’ll dwell on my anger.

I’m sure some of you can relate to at least one of those things. Everyone gets mad, it just happens. But sometimes we get too mad at little things.

What I got mad at today, was my crochet pattern. I was typing it up, trying to get it ready to release today, but it was so confusing to me that I myself could hardly figure out what I did. And I started to get so frustrated. I didn’t know how I was supposed to write what I did and I didn’t know how others were supposed to figure out how to make it. Finally, I burst. I was so done. So I went on my bed and just dwelt on my problems, but at the same time, trying to figure out how to get out of this mood. Mostly, though, I was just dwelling on my problems. I was convinced this day couldn’t get any better and that I was going to be in a bad mood all day.

Then I texted my mom (yes, she was in the other room, but I didn’t wanna go out and talk): “I just wanna start this day over.”

How many times have you said that in your life? Sometimes your day just goes really bad and you feel like you can’t get through the rest of it.

My mom replied with: “Well you can. At any point. Breathe. Pray.”

I set my phone down and rolled over and just started crying. I knew she was right. I had even thought how I needed to pray, but I didn’t want to. I felt like it wouldn’t help. But, I sat up, closed my eyes and cried silently as I prayed.
I gave my problems over to God and I asked Him to help me. Then I started singing lyrics in my head from two different songs:

“Lord I need you, oh I need you. Every hour I need you.”
“You find me here at Your feet again. Everything I have, reaching out I surrender.”

Then the craziest thing happened – I realized I was smiling and the tears had stopped. God did help me through it. He helped me to let go of my anger and start my day over. After all that, I got my crochet items all set for pictures while I listened to some worship songs by Lauren Daigle. Her songs are so uplifting. If you haven’t already, I recommend you listen to How Can It Be, First, and Trust In You. They’re great 🙂

So here is my advice for you when you’re having a bad day, dealing with a lot of problems, or if you’re angry at something:

1. Have some alone time. If you feel like you need to cry, just let it out. I personally feel like holding it in makes me feel worse.
2. Pray. Hand it all over to God. He’ll take it from there.
3. Once you start feeling better, listen to praise songs the rest of the day. It’ll help keep you on the right track – in a happy, positive mood.

I know it can be hard to let go of your anger, but don’t hold onto it. Doing that only leaves you feeling miserable, as well as the people around you. Your moods really affect other people. You can start your day over at any time, just ask God for help 🙂

“So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.” Luke 11:9


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